All Episodes (156)
Adaptation: A Jack Reacher Roundtable and other books that become movies
Dudes Chatting — Film adaptations (books that become movies): The debut main segment is a wide-ranging conversation on what makes a book-to-film adaptation work, hung on the new release of Jack Reacher: Never Go Back. JV…
There's no crying in podcasts!
Dudes Chatting — A Tom Hanks symposium: After a cold open in which Sonny airs his real-life grudge against Anthony Weiner (who mocked his name at a congressional baseball practice, sparking years of imagined "revenge"), …
America Divided … Between Marvel and DC
Dudes Chatting — Marvel vs. DC: Framed as "the preeminent clash of our time," the guys dig into their comic-book roots and how those map onto (or invert in) the movie universes. JVL — a childhood DC loyalist who's since …
Alien Invasion (plus Thanksgiving tips!)
Dudes Chatting — Alien invasion movies: Built around Sonny's rave for Arrival (near the top of his year-end list — "like Contact but more artsy"), the guys taxonomize the whole alien-invasion genre: insect (Starship Troo…
The Substandard Christmas Spectacular
Dudes Chatting — Christmas movies: The centerpiece debate is whether Die Hard qualifies as a Christmas movie. JVL and Vic firmly defend it (the whole plot hinges on a Christmas party; the climax is set to "Let It Snow");…
The Substandard Goes Rogue
Dudes Chatting — Star Wars nostalgia and the Empire-is-Good thesis: Recorded the week Rogue One hit theaters, the episode has two distinct halves. The first is a roughly 22-minute tour of childhood Star Wars toy memories…
Gilmore Girls and Other Guilty Pleasures
Dudes Chatting — Guilty pleasures: JVL taxonomizes guilty pleasures into four categories and leads with his own: Gilmore Girls, which he has watched since its WB days and argues features Rory as the true villain, not the…
Rogue One Redux
Dudes Chatting — Rogue One deep dive (full spoilers): All three give Rogue One a second look. JVL declares it the best Star Wars film ever made, surpassing even The Empire Strikes Back, praising the morally compromised c…
Funny How? The Substandard Tackles Scorsese
Reviews: Sonny saw Silence (Scorsese) — a two-hour-forty-minute film about Jesuit priests in 17th-century Japan, based on Shusaku Endo's novel, starring Andrew Garfield and Adam Driver. Thoughtful and intense, it raises …
What We Really Want to Do is a Podcast
Reviews: Brief discussion of Patriots Day (Peter Berg, Boston Marathon bombing — Sonny plans to see it) and Live by Night (Ben Affleck's Prohibition gangster film — mixed reception, Sonny will skip). Dudes Chatting — Act…
A Farewell to Malls
Dudes Chatting — The death of the American mall: Prompted by The Limited closing all 250 stores (joining Aeropostale, Pacific Sun, American Apparel, and Wet Seal in collapse, with Macy's and Sears closing hundreds of loc…
Are Movie Twist Endings Overrated?
Reviews: Sonny reviews Split (M. Night Shyamalan) — positively; James McAvoy plays a man with 23 personalities who kidnaps three girls; "successful camp." The surprise ending links the film to the Unbreakable universe. D…
The Substandard Gets into Character
Dudes Chatting — Character actors: Prompted by the deaths of John Hurt and Miguel Ferrer, the group meditates on what makes a great character actor. JVL names his Mount Rushmore as Scott Glenn, Fred Thompson, Peter Coyot…
Any Given Thursday
Dudes Chatting — Sports movies: Timed to Super Bowl LI (Patriots comeback win, which Vic slept through in an Orlando hotel room after the signal cut out), the group breaks the genre into sports comedies, baseball films, …
Whoa! It's the Substandard Keanu Reeves Episode
Reviews: Sonny reviews John Wick: Chapter 2 — fresh, but slightly less tight than the original at two hours; praises the world-building (the Camorra marker system, The Continental's international outposts, the switchboar…
The Substandard Oscars Episode
Dudes Chatting — Best Picture winners, losers, and oversights: Pre-Oscar preview (the group expects La La Land to win). The group identifies their best Best Picture winners of the last 50 years: The Godfather and The God…
The Envelope, Please.
Dudes Chatting — Oscar night reaction: A short bonus episode (11 minutes) recorded immediately after the 2017 ceremony. Moonlight wins Best Picture in one of the biggest upsets and snafus in Oscar history: Warren Beatty …
The Substandard Doubles Down
Dudes Chatting — Bill Paxton tribute and gambling movies: The episode opens mourning Bill Paxton (died age 61 after heart surgery). The group ranks his roles: consensus that his True Lies car salesman is his funniest par…
The Substandard X-Men Episode
Reviews: Sonny reviews Logan — fresh but skeptical of the critical groupthink rating it 93% on Rotten Tomatoes; calls it "Little Miss Mutant Sunshine," appreciates its Cormac McCarthy–meets–X-Men road-trip tone, but find…
The Substandard Goes Ape!
Dudes Chatting — monster rankings: The main segment has the hosts debating the greatest movie monsters of all time, sparked by excitement over the Atomic Blonde trailer and Kong: Skull Island's box office dominance. JVL …
The Substandard does Beauty and the Beast
Dudes Chatting — Disney rankings: The episode opens with cold-open banter and a digression about Axis & Allies board games, then pivots into an extended ranking and defense of the Disney animated canon. Sonny identifies …
The Substandard Dissects the New Justice League Trailer
Dudes Chatting — the Justice League trailer: This micro-episode is devoted entirely to the newly released Justice League trailer. JVL finds it wholesale terrible — no interesting images, no compelling story, no star with…
The Substandard Takes on Power Rangers, CHiPs, and the Best/Worst Hollywood Reboots
Dudes Chatting — best and worst TV-to-movie reboots: The episode opens with a brief obituary for Chuck Barris, creator of The Gong Show, before moving to the main segment. JVL presents his ranked list of TV-to-film reboo…
The Substandard Celebrates March Madness
Dudes Chatting — NCAA brackets and the Georgetown curse: This micro-episode covers March Madness, with the hosts discussing their bracket picks before the conversation settles on Georgetown basketball's long arc of disap…
The Substandard Loves Scarlett Johansson
Dudes Chatting — Scarlett Johansson career appreciation: The episode opens with news that Joss Whedon has been hired to direct Batgirl, prompting JVL to rank Whedon's career output: Astonishing X-Men (the comics run) at …
The Substandard Will Not Re-Tweet That Wendy's Nuggets Guy
Dudes Chatting — nuggets and internet panhandling: This micro-episode takes up the viral moment where a teenager asked Wendy's on Twitter for a year of free nuggets if his tweet got retweeted 18 million times. Sonny is p…
The Substandard on Red Eye, Ragnarok, and Michael Caine
Dudes Chatting — Michael Caine: The main segment is a deep-dive into Michael Caine's career, organized around the "Caine-Hackman Theory" (coined in the movie PCU): that any movie on basic cable is made better by the pres…
The Substandard on Star Wars
Dudes Chatting — The Last Jedi teaser: This micro-episode is a reaction to the first The Last Jedi teaser trailer. Both JVL and Sonny are unimpressed: JVL argues the trailer is essentially a beat-for-beat re-run of the T…
The Substandard Gets Fast and Furious
Dudes Chatting — the Fast & Furious franchise: The episode opens with Vic recounting a family trip to New York City, then moves into a comprehensive ranking and defense of the entire Fast & Furious series. JVL's ranking:…
The Substandard on the Unhappy Days of Erin Moran
Dudes Chatting — the death of Erin Moran: This micro-episode is a tribute to Erin Moran, who played Joanie on Happy Days and Joanie Loves Chachi, and who died at 56. The hosts trace Happy Days' history as a foundational …
THE SUBSTANDARD SUMMER BLOCKBUSTER PREVIEW
Dudes Chatting — summer 2017 movie preview: The episode marks the show's 25-episode milestone with a cold-open gag: Vic does a Michael Caine impression (voiced as a studio "guest") that Sonny plays completely straight, t…
The Substandard on Boxing vs. UFC
Dudes Chatting — boxing vs. UFC: This micro-episode opens with Vic noting that the Anthony Joshua–Wladimir Klitschko fight at Wembley (90,000 in attendance, shown free on Showtime/HBO) somehow flew under everyone's radar…
The Substandard on the Circle, Techno Thrillers, and ... the Cheesecake Factory?
Dudes Chatting — food snobbery, techno-thrillers, and the Cheesecake Factory: The episode opens with a cold read from John Podhoretz before the hosts dig into a "8 Chains You Should Never Eat At" article by a food writer…
THE SUBSTANDARD CELEBRATES THE KENTUCKY DERBY
Dudes Chatting — Kentucky Derby and gambling: Vic hosts an imagined Kentucky Derby party at "Michael Caine's" house — one of Vic's recurring impression characters — complete with mint juleps and a genteel atmosphere that…
The Substandard Reviews Guardians of The Galaxy and Pizza!
Dudes Chatting — pizza rankings: An extended and passionate segment on pizza. JVL ranks delivery chains, placing Costco's cafeteria pizza at the top and Papa John's dead last. Sonny names Five Guys (he acknowledges it is…
The Substandard on King Arthur, Guy Ritchie, and Powers Boothe
Dudes Chatting — tribute to Powers Boothe and Guy Ritchie's filmography: The episode opens with a genuine tribute to Powers Boothe, who died that week at age 68. All three hosts share appreciation for his work: his Emmy …
The Substandard Rates Burgers!
Dudes Chatting — burger chain rankings: Prompted by a Harris Poll top-ten burger chains list, the hosts debate what makes a great burger. Sonny makes the case for Five Guys over In-N-Out, arguing Five Guys wins on patty …
The Substandard on Ridley Scott and 'Alien: Covenant'
Dudes Chatting — Ridley Scott's career: The episode opens with a cold read from Kristin Soltis-Anderson before the main retrospective on Ridley Scott. JVL frames Scott as a prolific "working British director" whose singl…
The Substandard Salutes Our Military, War Flicks, and R. Lee Ermey
Dudes Chatting — Memorial Day war movies and R. Lee Ermey: The hosts share their Memorial Day war-movie favorites. Sonny picks Inglourious Basterds and Aliens (which he reads as a Vietnam allegory). JVL names the BBC Tin…
'Pirates' Sails, 'Baywatch' Sinks, and More on the Latest Substandard
Dudes Chatting — Johnny Depp, IP mania, and the future of theaters: The episode's connective tissue is the state of Hollywood franchises and the celebrity economics behind them. The Johnny Depp discussion is extensive an…
The Substandard’s List of Movie Theater Grievances
Dudes Chatting — movie theater grievances ("Harry Send" episode): Billed as a cranky-old-men venting session, the episode covers a range of theater sins with escalating specificity. JVL opens with a contrarian claim that…
The Substandard Wonder Woman Episode
Dudes Chatting — box office context for Wonder Woman and the DCEU: JVL opens with show-and-tell: he has brought a die-cast Soul of Chogokin Yamato battleship model (70,000 yen) to the studio and is visibly pleased about …
The Substandard Ranks the Batmen
Dudes Chatting — ranking the Batmen, occasioned by Adam West's death: Adam West died on June 9, 2017, at 88, and the micro-episode serves as a tribute and prompt for Batman rankings. Sonny appreciates West's self-aware q…
The Substandard on 'The Mummy,' Tennis, and Avocado Toast
Dudes Chatting — the Dark Universe, classic monsters, cinematic universes, and avocado toast: The episode covers a lot of ground. Sonny reviews The Mummy and uses it to diagnose Universal's "Dark Universe" project: unlik…
The Substandard on Transformers, Michael Bay, and Fireworks!
Dudes Chatting — Michael Bay's oeuvre, fireworks, and The Dark Knight in the classroom: The episode marks a return from a hiatus. JVL opens by recounting two trips away: to the Broadmoor in Colorado Springs and then to N…
The Substandard Amazon Prime Day Spectacular
Dudes Chatting — Amazon Prime Day: The hosts riff on Amazon Prime Day deals and what they actually bought. JVL picked up the Dark Knight trilogy on Prime; Sonny got books including Dune and Neal Stephenson titles; Vic sc…
The Substandard on Spider-Man, Amelia Earhart, and Cured Meats
Dudes Chatting — Amelia Earhart and "In Search Of": The episode opens on the History Channel special claiming photographic proof that Amelia Earhart survived her disappearance — a claim quickly debunked when the photo wa…
The Substandard Remembers George Romero and Martin Landau
Dudes Chatting — George Romero and Martin Landau: The hosts pay tribute to two recently deceased figures. On George Romero: Sonny credits him as the progenitor of the modern zombie via Night of the Living Dead and Dawn o…
The Substandard on Talking Apes, Star Wars Fantasies, and ‘Driverless’ Cars
Dudes Chatting — Self-Driving Cars, Star Wars Land, and Post-Apocalyptic Movies: Vic opens with a Tesla Model X test drive on I-66, raving about ludicrous-mode acceleration and autopilot. JVL pushes back hard, insisting …
The Substandard on Dunkirk, Christopher Nolan Films, and more Tesla
Reviews: Dunkirk — unanimous praise. Sonny calls it "the third act of a Christopher Nolan movie" stretched to feature length: pure cinema, almost a horror film about drowning that happens to be set at Dunkirk, structured…
The Substandard on Sam Shepard, Chuck Yeager, and G.I. Joe
Dudes Chatting — Sam Shepard, Chuck Yeager, and G.I. Joe Planes: The hosts remember Sam Shepard, who died at 73 from ALS. Vic notes that not having mentioned Shepard before seems to have spared him from "the curse." JVL …
The Substandard on Valerian, Luc Besson, and Chinese Buffets
Dudes Chatting — Chinese Buffet Rankings: JVL opens with what he calls the "third best night of his life": a Prince William County Nationals minor league game where his son won a player's game-worn jersey in a raffle, he…
Dunkin' but No Donuts?
Dudes Chatting — Donut Chain Rankings and Corporate Rebranding: The news hook is reports that Dunkin' Donuts is testing a rebrand to simply "Dunkin'" at new Pasadena locations, dropping "Donuts" from the name entirely. T…
The Substandard on Atomic Blonde, Death Wish, and 3-D
Dudes Chatting — The Death Wish Remake and the Decline of 3-D: The trailer for the Death Wish remake (Eli Roth directing, Bruce Willis starring) prompts a debate: JVL argues that "alt-right" has become the new content-fr…
The Substandard Looks Back on Fast Times at Ridgemont High
Dudes Chatting — Fast Times at Ridgemont High, 35 Years Later: Pegged to a Variety retrospective on the film's 35th anniversary, the hosts revisit Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1982) as the template for the modern teen m…
The Substandard on The Dark Tower, Stephen King, and Box Office Blues
Box Office: Annabelle: Creation opened at #1 with $35M. Dunkirk held strongly at $11.4M in its fourth week. The Dark Tower collapsed to $7.9M in its second frame (a roughly 60% drop), bringing its total to $34M. Overall …
The Substandard on Logan Lucky, Soderbergh Ranked, and Dudes Chattin’!
(JVL out; Mike Warren guest-hosts.) Dudes Chatting — podcasting and "dudes chatting": The episode opens with Vic, Sonny, and guest Mike Warren riffing on a tweet by Washington Examiner colleague Tim Carney dismissing pod…
The Substandard on The Trip to Spain, Road Trip Movies, and ’90s Classic Rock
Note: JVL is absent from this episode for a second consecutive week. Weekly Standard staff writer Mike Warren again fills in as third host. The episode opens with a faux endorsement from "Bill Kristol" praising Mike Warr…
The Substandard on Summer Box Office Blues
Dudes Chatting — summer box office and Hollywood quality: All three hosts dig into what turned out to be the worst Labor Day weekend at the box office in 17 years — for the first time since 1992, no major studio released…
The Substandard on Close Encounters, ranking Spielberg, and Ice Cream!
Dudes Chatting — Close Encounters of the Third Kind, Spielberg ranking, and ice cream: JVL returns from vacation to an extended cold-open covering Sonny's lament over the closure of his local Chili's and the retirement o…
The Substandard Needs Therapy!
Dudes Chatting — the show is eating the friendship: JVL opens with a genuine lament: the podcast is cannibalizing his real-life friendship with Vic and Sonny. He wants to fire off a text about something funny he saw, but…
The Substandard on It, Why Horror Sells, and a Sweater Ranking
Dudes Chatting — sweaters, horror economics, and It: The cold open involves a debate about the NFL Red Zone channel, which rolls into a White Stripes / "Seven Nation Army" riff and a prolonged discussion of Steve Bannon'…
The Substandard on Pumpkin Spice—the Flavor of Fall?
Dudes Chatting — pumpkin spice and the flavor of fall: The hosts debate whether pumpkin spice has rightfully earned its status as the official flavor of fall or whether it has become overexposed and clichéd. JVL argues t…
The Substandard on mother! Worst Movies Ever, and Ice Cream
Dudes Chatting — ice cream, mother!, and the taxonomy of worst movies ever: The cold open covers JVL's daughter's strep throat saving him from a camping trip, Vic's weekend air show (F-22 Raptor, B-17, B-29 in formation)…
The Substandard Tackles Bobby 'the Brain' Heenan
Dudes Chatting — Bobby "the Brain" Heenan tribute: The episode opens with a clip of Heenan sparring with a play-by-play announcer. The hosts pay tribute to Bobby "the Brain" Heenan, who died at age 72 after a long battle…
The Substandard on Kingsman, Layer Cake, and Free Samples!
Dudes Chatting — Kingsman: The Golden Circle, Layer Cake, and Matthew Vaughn: The cold open covers National Hobbit Day, JVL eyeing the $800 Lego Millennium Falcon set while his wife is out of town, Sonny's fantasy baseba…
The Substandard Bootleg Episode
Dudes Chatting — game shows, Battle of the Sexes, and American Made: The episode opens with an explanation of the audio disaster: the mixing board was misconfigured, forcing the hosts to shout throughout recording, givin…
The Substandard Breaks Down The Last Jedi Trailer
Dudes Chatting — The Last Jedi trailer reaction: All three hosts react immediately after watching the trailer that debuted during Monday Night Football halftime. Sonny notes he and Vic had already seen it; JVL's first-wo…
The Substandard on Blade Runner 2049, Harvey Weinstein, and the Lost Episode
Dudes Chatting — Blade Runner 2049, Harvey Weinstein, and the lost episode: The cold open explains the audio disaster of episode 067. JVL recounts being rejected as a brand ambassador by a surf shop — he applied, got tur…
The Substandard Ranks the Greatest Sports Wives, Ever
Dudes Chatting — ranking the greatest sports wives: Prompted by a Page Six item about Kate Upton switching from Yankees to Astros gear to support her fiancé Justin Verlander during the ALCS, and the discovery that Jane S…
The Substandard on Arby’s, Aging Action Stars, and the Apple Watch
Dudes Chatting — Arby's, the Apple Watch, aging action stars, and The Foreigner: The cold open covers the show's first Facebook Live micro-episode (from two days prior), with JVL making love to the camera while Sonny and…
The Substandard on Sparkling Wine vs. Champagne
Micro episode (7:48). All three hosts present. Dudes Chatting — champagne vs. sparkling wine: Vic opens with a distinction he picked up during a 2009 trip to the Champagne region of France: true champagne must originate …
The Substandard Halloween Candy Draft Episode
Full episode (73 min). All three hosts present. Dudes Chatting — Halloween candy snake draft: The entire episode is a ten-round snake draft of Halloween candies. JVL picks first and sixth in each snake, Vic second and fi…
The Substandard Halloween Leftovers Episode
Micro episode (10:55, recorded Halloween day). All three hosts present. Dudes Chatting — Halloween costumes and horror recommendations: The hosts swap childhood and adult Halloween costume stories. JVL wore Darth Vader a…
The Substandard on Suburbicon, Hollywood Smugness, and … another Candy Draft?
Dudes Chatting — Hollywood smugness and smug-Hollywood movies: Sonny, Vic, and JVL use George Clooney's Suburbicon as a launching pad for a broader discussion of Hollywood's self-congratulatory streak. Sonny argues that …
The Substandard on Tipping and Other Life Lessons
Micro episode (10:55). All three hosts present. Dudes Chatting — tipping etiquette and life lessons: Vic recounts being recognized twice from the podcast and Facebook Live in one week — once at a Fall Festival, once at U…
Hammer Time: The Substandard on Thor, Fake Lego, and Drinking Tips
Full episode (57:44). All three hosts present. Dudes Chatting — Lepin Lego, woodshop, bar-crawl tips, and Murder on the Orient Express: JVL reveals he bought a Chinese knockoff Lego set — a Lepin Avengers Helicarrier — a…
The Substandard on Stranger Things
Micro episode (12:13). All three hosts present. The episode is entirely a Stranger Things Season 2 discussion. Dudes Chatting — Stranger Things Season 2: Vic and Sonny are fans; JVL refuses to watch, citing skepticism of…
The Substandard on Murder on the Orient Express, More Chinese Food, and Dowels
Full episode (61:23). All three hosts present. Dudes Chatting — Chinese buffet, Apple Watch, and woodshop: Sonny visited the Golden Grill Buffet in Bailey's Crossroads — positive report covering multiple stations includi…
The Substandard on Justice League and Thanksgiving Bracketology!
Full episode (70:47). All three hosts present. Dudes Chatting — screeners, Rotten Tomatoes, woodshop finale, and whiskey judging: Sonny watched First, They Killed My Father (Angelina Jolie directing — surprisingly good) …
The Substandard on Justice League woes and ... hugs?
Micro episode (12:47). All three hosts present. Dudes Chatting — John Lasseter and the Justice League collapse: Justice League dropped over 56% in its second weekend, falling to #2 with $40M behind Pixar's Coco at #1 wit…
The Substandard Loves Denzel Washington and Disco Fries!
Full episode (54:08). All three hosts present. Vic is audibly ill throughout. Dudes Chatting — Thanksgiving travels, Lepin build update, Coco, and Denzel Washington: Vic reports a smooth Thanksgiving drive to New Jersey …
Shazam! The Substandard on Jim Nabors and the Art of the Spinoff
Micro episode (12:51). All three hosts present. Dudes Chatting — Jim Nabors, childhood TV, and the art of the spinoff: The episode opens with Vic's tribute to Jim Nabors — Gomer Pyle on The Andy Griffith Show and Gomer P…
The Substandard on The Disaster Artist and Cult Classics
Dudes Chatting — what makes a cult classic?: Following up on The Disaster Artist, the three hosts dig into the definition of a cult classic. JVL asks whether they have to be bad, have to be quotable, and whether cult sta…
The Substandard on Star Wars: The Last Jedi
Dudes Chatting — Star Wars: The Last Jedi (non-spoiler): Vic, in character as Gene, calls in to bestow a grudging three stars on The Last Jedi, lamenting that the porgs should have been named after more dignified birds a…
The Substandard on 'Darkest Hour', Gary Oldman, and Watches
Dudes Chatting — Darkest Hour, Gary Oldman, and watches: The episode opens with an extended detour into horology: JVL received an Omega Seamaster Coaxial as an anniversary gift and the hosts go deep on mechanical watches…
The Substandard on Star Wars: The Last Jedi (with Spoilers)
Dudes Chatting — The Last Jedi (full spoilers): The long-form spoiler episode the gang promised in episode 085. Gene/Vic opens with another three-star call before the hosts go deep. Sonny draws a structural distinction b…
The Substandard Micro Christmas Episode
Dudes Chatting — Christmas traditions and A Christmas Carol adaptations: A holiday micro-episode opening with a clip from the Six Million Dollar Man Christmas special. The hosts rank their favorite A Christmas Carol adap…
Substandard: In a World Without Vic...
Vic is absent this episode — only Sonny and JVL appear. They acknowledge early on that the show doesn't quite work without him. Dudes Chatting — 2017 year in review and The Last Jedi box office deep dive: Sonny and JVL o…
The Substandard on the Golden Globes
Dudes Chatting — Golden Globes recap: Vic is back, celebrated briefly before a Georgetown-basketball-and-Patrick-Ewing tangent. On the Globes: all attendees wore black in solidarity with the Time's Up movement; The Handm…
The Substandard on 'Bright' and the Future of Netflix
Dudes Chatting — Bright and the Netflix business model: Vic's return after his absence in episode 089 is celebrated. Bright (David Ayer / Max Landis / Will Smith — "Training Day meets Lord of the Rings") gets a split ver…
The Substandard Coconuts Issue
Dudes Chatting — The great coconut debate: A micro-episode entirely devoted to Sonny's Twitter-spawned coconut vendetta. Sonny holds that coconut is "the worst flavor" in existence and makes everything it touches worse, …
The Substandard on Paul Thomas Anderson, Favorite Restrooms, and Eagles Fanfiction
Dudes Chatting — Phantom Thread and a Paul Thomas Anderson career deep dive: JVL opens in a state of Eagles-beat-Vikings euphoria and performs a bit of "Eagles fan fiction" involving Ricky Watters and Andy Reid. The main…
The Substandard on the Oscar Nominees
Dudes Chatting — Oscar nominees breakdown: A micro-episode reacting to the newly announced nominations. The Shape of Water leads with 13 nominations and is the frontrunner; Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri won t…
The Substandard on 12 Strong, Eagles, and Rats
Dudes Chatting — war movies, post-9/11 cinema, and a rat in the bathroom: The episode opens with an extended Eagles-Patriots Super Bowl preview: JVL (in his Brian Dawkins jersey) argues the line should be closer to 3.5 p…
The Substandard on the Aussie Open and Agassi's Hairpiece
Dudes Chatting — Australian Open and Agassi's hairpiece: A micro-episode pegged to Roger Federer winning his 20th Grand Slam title at age 36. Sonny watched zero seconds of the tournament; JVL explains that the Australian…
The Substandard on Disney-Fox, Breakfast Samplers, and 'The Big Game'
Dudes Chatting — Disney–Fox merger, Marvel IP history, and "the big game": The episode opens with a cold-read montage of NFL advertisers trying to skirt the NFL's trademark on "Super Bowl" by calling it "the big game" — …
The Substandard Big Game Post Game Show!
Dudes Chatting — Eagles Super Bowl victory post-game: A celebratory micro-episode recorded the night of Super Bowl LII. JVL, a Philadelphia Eagles fan, is on an emotional high — he calls it the happiest he has been about…
The Substandard on Hostiles, Westerns, and Solo
Dudes Chatting — Super Bowl aftermath and trailers: The guys debrief on Super Bowl LII ads (the Tide campaign is declared the winner; "Dilly Dilly" has run its course) and trailers: the Solo: A Star Wars Story teaser lan…
The Substandard on the Olympics
Dudes Chatting — Winter Olympics: A micro-episode debate on the Pyeongchang Winter Games. JVL is an Olympics maximalist: he loves any sport where genuine stakes and adversity are on the line, and defends even the obscure…
The Substandard on Clint Eastwood, North Korea, and 50 Shades of Vic
Dudes Chatting — Eagles encore and North Korea at the Olympics: A brief Eagles victory lap (JVL is still elated) before the conversation turns dark: JVL is furious at Western media outlets fawning over Kim Yo-Jong, Kim J…
The Substandard on Lent
Dudes Chatting — Lenten sacrifices: A micro-episode centered on Ash Wednesday and the Catholic tradition of Lenten giving-up. JVL reveals he has sacrificed Schäfferhofer grapefruit beer, which he describes as his great d…
The Substandard on Black Panther, Quinoa, and Career Advice
Dudes Chatting — Quinoa disaster and Xbox setup chaos: Vic opens with a graphic account of a digestive catastrophe caused by quinoa and kombucha the night before recording, which he describes in more detail than anyone w…
The Substandard on Traffic Cameras
Dudes Chatting — Speed camera vigilantism: A micro-episode celebrating a man in Washington, D.C., who destroyed an automated speed camera with his bare hands. Sonny nominates him as his new personal hero. JVL explains th…
The Substandard on Annihilation, Natalie Portman, and Oscar Predictions
Dudes Chatting — Joss Whedon and Lenten failures: The episode opens on the news that Joss Whedon has exited Batgirl amid Me Too allegations and the Justice League backlash. Vic confesses his Lenten discipline collapsed o…
The Substandard Meat Lovers Episode
Dudes Chatting — JVL goes carnivore: A micro-episode built around JVL's surprising dietary revelation: despite being a longtime vegetarian, he has adopted an all-meat, zero-carb diet in an effort to lose weight. He arriv…
The Substandard on Death Wish, the 1970s, and Girl Scout Cookies
Dudes Chatting — Petty spending confessions: The episode opens with competing acts of frivolity: JVL's son spent $100 on Girl Scout cookies, buying from every troop member in the neighborhood except his own sister out of…
The Substandard Bracket-Busting Episode
Dudes Chatting — UMBC upsets Virginia and March Madness: A micro-episode centered on the first-ever 16-seed upset of a 1-seed in NCAA tournament history: UMBC 74, Virginia 54. JVL is delighted, both by the historic upset…
The Substandard on The Death of Stalin, Dark Humor, and Swingers
Dudes Chatting — Johnny Ivey and Sonny's Weekly Standard cover: The episode opens with JVL doing his "Johnny Ivey" bit — an impression of Jony Ive (Apple's former design chief) describing mundane objects in reverential p…
The Substandard on the Final Four and Nuns!
Dudes Chatting — Final Four and Sister Jean: A micro-episode reacting to the NCAA Final Four field: Kansas, Villanova, Michigan, and Loyola Chicago — whose 98-year-old team chaplain Sister Jean has become the tournament'…
The Substandard on Tomb Raider, Video Games, and Boneless Ribeyes
Dudes Chatting — video game movies: The gang debates whether video game adaptations are structurally doomed. JVL argues that fictional video-game-inspired films (Tron, The Last Starfighter, the new Jumanji) work better t…
The Substandard on The Americans
(JVL is out this week.) Vic and Sonny record from Free Beacon Studio 2A for a short micro-episode. Dudes Chatting — The Americans: Vic confesses he initially resisted rooting for Soviet spies posing as Americans, but cam…
The Substandard on Ready Player One and Close Shaves
Dudes Chatting — Spielberg's legacy: The gang defends Spielberg against the charge that he's past his prime. Vic recounts his recent New York trip including a shoe shine from the St. Regis butler and a straight-razor sha…
The Substandard on the New Solo Trailer
Micro-episode. All three react to the second Solo: A Star Wars Story trailer. JVL is more optimistic than expected — Alden Ehrenreich gives off a "young Christian Slater vibe" that he finds workable, and he declares he w…
The Substandard on Isle of Dogs, Wes Anderson, and Baseball!
Dudes Chatting — Wes Anderson's filmography: JVL argues The Royal Tenenbaums is a near-perfect film and everything after it a disappointment; Sonny traces the quality drop to Anderson losing Owen Wilson as co-writer. Bot…
The Substandard on Chappaquiddick
(JVL is out this week.) Vic and Sonny only, following a Washington Free Beacon field trip to see Chappaquiddick. Dudes Chatting — Chappaquiddick: Vic and Sonny break down the film as two movies in one: a tragedy about a …
The Substandard on Rampage, Dwayne Johnson, and Georgetown
Dudes Chatting — Dwayne Johnson's bankability: The guys examine whether Dwayne Johnson is actually a reliable box-office draw or merely a franchise revitalizer. They land on a $30–35M opening floor but conclude he can't …
The Substandard on Super Troopers, Stoner Flicks, and Kanye
Dudes Chatting — stoner movies, Kanye, and the art-vs-artist question: Sonny advises liberals to separate the artist from the art, using Kanye's Trump tweets as the occasion. JVL makes a moral case against the stoner com…
The Substandard on Avengers, Baseball, and Buffets
Dudes Chatting — buffet rankings: Vic's post-Avengers Sunday descended into a long family argument at an Irish bar buffet, which the gang expands into a full buffet-quality debate covering hotel breakfast spreads, Chines…
The Substandard on Margot Kidder plus Lois Lane Ranked
Micro-episode prompted by the death of Margot Kidder at 69 (Tom Wolfe's death is also briefly noted). JVL confesses he spent years confusing Kidder with Karen Allen. All three assess Kidder's Lois Lane — none are particu…
The Substandard on Summer 2018 Blockbusters
Dudes Chatting — best summers for movies and the 2018 summer preview: The gang does a round-robin ranking of most-anticipated summer 2018 films (Sonny: Mission: Impossible — Fallout, Sicario: Day of the Soldado, Under th…
The Substandard on 80s Lyrics and Philip Roth
Micro-episode. JVL reports that his wife Shannon just realized "Cherry Pie" by Warrant is not actually about pie — which he describes as a "scanners head-exploding" moment — and the revelation spread on Twitter into a ri…
The Substandard on Deadpool 2 and Grilling
Dudes Chatting — grills: Vic just bought a Weber Genesis II E310 for $699. JVL calls him "a stone cold sucker" and delivers an extended case that the Weber Genesis is a luxury-tax item, not a meaningful quality upgrade. …
The Substandard goes Solo!
Dudes Chatting — Solo: A Star Wars Story: Vic is absent; guest Matt Continetti (editor, Washington Free Beacon) sits in. All three review Solo. Sonny calls it "fine" — competently made but unnecessary, preferring Rogue O…
The Substandard Solo Redux
Dudes Chatting — Solo week two and Star Wars reckoning: Vic returns from a Rome pilgrimage (stayed at the Papal Residence, met the Pope in the cafeteria, scored a private Sistine Chapel tour, received Swiss Guard salutes…
The Substandard on Hockey, Soccer, and Parades!
Dudes Chatting — the Stanley Cup parade and the 2026 World Cup: Micro-episode. The Washington Capitals won the Stanley Cup and held a parade on Tuesday; JVL's commute took three hours (left at 8am, street closures starte…
The Substandard on Ocean's 8 and Gender Flipping
Dudes Chatting — Ocean's 8 and the gender-flip question: Vic does his "Gene" impression reviewing Ocean's 8: four stars, a cascade of cast-name puns, "like a jewel heist meets Sister Act." The real reviews: Sonny loved i…
The Substandard on AMC vs. MoviePass
Dudes Chatting — AMC Stubs A-List vs. MoviePass: Micro-episode. AMC Theatres has announced its own subscription service: $19.95/month, up to three movies a week including IMAX and Dolby. The guys dissect why MoviePass ne…
The Substandard on Incredibles 2, Pixar, and Dishwashers
Dudes Chatting — Incredibles 2 and Pixar: Sonny and Vic saw Incredibles 2 (JVL did not). The film picks up immediately after the first; themes include a superhero PR campaign, a Screen Slaver villain who hypnotizes throu…
The Substandard on Jurassic World, Dishwashing Drama, and Sand
Dudes Chatting — Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom: Sonny delivers the most analytical review: the core problem is that the film is philosophically opposite to the original Jurassic Park — where Crichton's thesis was "scien…
The Substandard on LeBron
Dudes Chatting — LeBron James to the Lakers: Micro-episode. LeBron has signed with the LA Lakers, four years/$153.3M. JVL frames LeBron's entire career through pro wrestling: the original Cleveland heel turn was one of s…
The Substandard on Sicario and Sequels Ranked
Dudes Chatting — Sicario: Day of the Soldado and sequels ranked: Vic is away on a Disney cruise (pre-taped segment). Sonny reviews Day of the Soldado: he's hugely fond of the Denis Villeneuve original, and the sequel's c…
The Substandard on Steve Ditko and Supervillains
Dudes Chatting — Steve Ditko and favorite Spider-Man villains: Micro-episode. Steve Ditko died June 29, aged 90, found in his apartment after seven days — as reclusive in death as in life. Ditko co-created Spider-Man, Do…
The Substandard on Ant-Man, Cruising, and Dishwasher Trolling
Dudes Chatting — Ant-Man and the Wasp and Vic's Disney cruise: All three review Ant-Man and the Wasp. Sonny: totally entertaining in the moment, but barely memorable afterward; the mid-credits Infinity War snap that wipe…
The Substandard on Blessed Prime Day 2018
Dudes Chatting — Blessed Prime Day 2018: Micro-episode devoted to Amazon Prime Day. The group first debates the correct greeting ("Merry Prime Day," "Blessed Prime Day," "Hail Bezos") before getting to purchases. Sonny b…
The Substandard on Skyscraper, Disaster Flicks, and Baseball Cards
Dudes Chatting — Skyscraper, disaster films, and baseball cards: Vic does his "Gene" impression reviewing Skyscraper: four stars, Rock puns throughout (he's "hopping mad," must "go out on a limb"), and a polygamy joke ab…
The Substandard on Aquaman and Shazam!
Dudes Chatting — DC's Comic-Con trailers: A micro-episode devoted entirely to the just-released Aquaman and Shazam! trailers. JVL is harshly dismissive of Aquaman, arguing the CGI looks like the Gungans from The Phantom …
The Substandard on Kubrick, 2001, and James Gunn
Dudes Chatting — James Gunn firing and Kubrick's 2001: A Space Odyssey: The episode opens on the James Gunn controversy. Sonny frames his firing from Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 as a case study in weaponized outrage c…
The Substandard on Mission Impossible, Tom Cruise, and Fan Mail!
Dudes Chatting — the Mission: Impossible franchise and Tom Cruise: All three hosts saw Mission: Impossible – Fallout and unanimously love it. Sonny leads the main review: he calls it the best opening ever for a Mission: …
The Substandard on Christopher Robin, Hook, and the Kenmore of Cars
Dudes Chatting — Consumer philosophy, Hook, and MI: Fallout revisited: JVL announces a new car purchase — a Kia Forte — and explains his "Kenmore of cars" philosophy: appliances should be reliable and anonymous, not stat…
The Substandard on The Meg and Summer Box Office 2018
Dudes Chatting — Summer 2018 box office retrospective: Opening anecdotes: JVL's son Flash called him a "nerd" at the comic book shop; Sonny's dog got stuck on a glue trap and he freed it with dish soap and vegetable oil;…
The Substandard Summer Clip Show
Dudes Chatting — Gene Shalit summer clip show: JVL is absent this week at the beach. It is just Vic and Sonny. The episode opens with Vic and Sonny conducting a Cherry Cola Oreo taste test (verdict: terrible, the filling…
The Substandard on Tom Clancy, 5Ks, and Practice!
Dudes Chatting — Tom Clancy's Jack Ryan (Amazon) and rankings: JVL returns from the beach bearing candy cigarette souvenirs. Flash played his first baseball game; the Allen Iverson "practice" speech is invoked as JVL des…
The Substandard on Peppermint, Jennifer Garner, and Serena!
Dudes Chatting — Jennifer Garner, 1980s action movies, and Serena Williams: The episode marks the first recording from the Free Beacon's new Studio 2A. Vic triumphantly reports completing his 5K in 28:49 with negative sp…
The Substandard on The Predator and Captain Marvel
Dudes Chatting — The Predator and the Captain Marvel trailer: JVL opens by declaring King Arthur: Legend of the Sword the best fantasy film since The Fellowship of the Ring after watching it twice on a plane; Sonny remai…
The Substandard on YA Adaptations and Pillow Talk
Dudes Chatting — YA adaptations and the Fantastic Beasts problem: JVL opens with an extended account of replacing his 30-year-old pillow: after years of inability to sleep on any other pillow, he ordered ten-to-fifteen u…
The Substandard Oscar Draft!
Dudes Chatting — Oscar fantasy draft and A Star is Born preview: JVL recounts Flash's dual-jersey Cubs/Red Sox hedging at the Cubs-Rockies wild-card game ("I've failed as a parent"). Sonny is in the process of decorating…
The Substandard on Venom, Texas, and Watches
Dudes Chatting — Watches, Texas, and Venom: JVL opens by unveiling his new Seiko SARX055 "baby snowflake" titanium watch, purchased after a chance visit to the Omega boutique at Tysons Corner with friends from the second…
The Substandard on First Man and Concierge Bee Keepers!
Dudes Chatting — First Man, NASA movie rankings, and concierge beekeeping: JVL had the weekend "dealer's choice" topics: Flash's baseball progress, the dishwasher decibel dispute with his wife, and concierge beekeeping. …
The Substandard on Halloween and Exotic Swing Sets
Dudes Chatting — Horror movies, franchises, and the golden age of the slasher: The episode opens with the boys discussing their weekends — JVL's batting-cage-and-cheesesteaks trip to Philly, Sonny's harrowing encounter w…
The Substandard on Bohemian Rhapsody and Postelection Analysis!
Dudes Chatting — Bohemian Rhapsody and Queen: Sonny is out on paternity leave; guest Mike Warren fills in. After a mock post-election roundtable (the trio riffing on deliberately empty political analysis), the conversati…
The Substandard on Stan Lee, The Good Place, and Fanta
Dudes Chatting — Stan Lee, The Good Place, and Nazi soda: Sonny returns from two weeks of paternity leave. The episode opens with JVL revealing that Fanta was invented by the Nazi-era German Coca-Cola bottlers cut off fr…
The Substandard on Widows and Meeting the SSEU
Dudes Chatting — the first Substandard Expanded Universe party (SwampCon): JVL hosted roughly 30–35 podcast listeners at his home — newly repainted and refurnished for the occasion — marking the show's 100th main episode…
The Substandard on Creed II, Ricky Jay, and Dimming Zones
Dudes Chatting — Creed II, Ricky Jay, and television technology: The episode opens with an extended riff on JVL's Black Friday TV purchase: a 65-inch TCL 4K full-array LED with 120 local dimming zones. JVL explains the t…
The Substandard on Green Book, Italian Accents, and Vic's Picks
Dudes Chatting — Green Book and Vic's year-in-review: The cold open covers Vic's gout flare-up and his spa day in Scottsdale (where he discovered colleague Mike Warren was already in the same massage suite). Gene deliver…
The Substandard: Endgame
Dudes Chatting — The Ballad of Buster Scruggs, the Avengers: Endgame trailer, and Netflix: This is the final episode of The Weekly Substandard. Vic opens by thanking the 767 reviewers on iTunes (716 of whom gave five sta…