#145. Ticket to Paradise
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Mary Katherine Hamm (MKH) fills in for the still-recovering Vic as the hosts review Ticket to Paradise (2022), the George Clooney/Julia Roberts romantic comedy set in Bali. Sonny calls it "replacement level" early-2000s rom-com fare — the laziest-plotted movie he's seen in ages, with virtually no constructed jokes, that works purely because Clooney is "effortlessly" movie-star charming (JVL dubs him "the modern Cary Grant") and Roberts still flashes a great smile; Sonny also likes that it's shot on real Bali locations rather than green screen. JVL is harsher, calling a drunken beer-pong dancing scene "disrespectful to the institution of the movie star," likening the whole enterprise to a big-budget Red Notice-style Netflix rom-com, and — as a child of divorce himself — bristling at the film's breezy treatment of a happily-quipping divorced couple. MKH agrees Clooney is a delight but the writing didn't work for her either, wishes the film had actually explored the messiness of a 25-years-later reunion between exes, and notes the biggest laugh actually came from the credits gag reel's "1-800 Brad Pitt" line. The opening third runs long and lively: MKH explains Vic is recovering from having his abscessed wisdom tooth (nicknamed "Gabriel") pulled, JVL runs a long live World Series/Astros sticky-stuff-cheating tangent, MKH — eight months pregnant with her fourth child — recounts her husband throwing out his back at the gym mid-errand of bringing her McDonald's, which spirals into a full McDonald's breakfast-sandwich ranking (JVL and MKH champion the bacon-egg-and-cheese biscuit, Sonny pushes the underrated bagel, all three agree the McGriddle is the worst), and Sonny recounts a gruesome pink-eye saga that struck during his son's pumpkin-carving birthday party, forcing him into sunglasses after dark. They close by checking in on Vic's post-surgery recovery, with MKH relieved to report his personality "seems unchanged."
From the show notes
MKH joins Sonny and JVL to discuss ... this.
Full transcript
Guest00:00:00Come on, you've got to be kidding me. Excuse me, ma'am. I need to sit somewhere else We used to be married worst 19 years of my life. We were only married for five. I'm counting the recovery In four days time our daughter's gonna marry a guy she just met in Bali millions of miles from home I just really want to kiss you It's like I looked up for the first time and realized everything I ever wanted was right in front of me She's throwing her career away just like her mother did so I'm the only one who can stop her. She doesn't listen to him Champagne, oh - please just leave the bottle. Thank you
Sonny00:00:41Hello and welcome to another edition of the sub beacon I'm Sonny Bunch Victor Mattis continues to be out Recuperating from his Gabriel surgery the malignant tooth is gone, but not forgotten We'll detail more of this later when he actually comes back. I we are joined today By a special guest host. We got Mary Katherine Hamm here hanging in
JVL00:01:03The the other host long time friend of the show long time friend of the show previous
Sonny00:01:09Fill-in guest host we've had her on before everybody loves MKH. It's always nice to have a lady on the show
Guest00:01:17Thank you. Thank you. Frankly. Thank you. Thank you. I try a little diversity
JVL00:01:22Wait a minute. Is it is it an a coincidence that she brought her Mary Katherine in for the lady movie?
Sonny00:01:28No, it's 100% intentional. I I was well, we'll we'll get to that in a minute. Don't worry I got I got a whole thing there So but before we before we kick it to MKH to see what's going on with her JBL breaking news
JVL00:01:45Gene Segura is at the plate. Not no more. Yeah. No, he grabbed out to short We are we are you right now as well in the curtain back pulling the curtain back. We're in the bottom of the fourth Philly is At at the plate. They are down two to one. This is only the seventh time in American history that Two teams from the same cities are meeting simultaneously in the World Series and on the NFL gridiron on the same day and in fact, it's happening at the same time simultaneously The Eagles are playing the Houston Texans and the Phillies are playing the Houston Astros
Sonny00:02:25Are there are the games in different cities?
JVL00:02:28I believe the Eagles are in Houston I could be wrong about that because I'm not watching it because it's just midseason NFL who cares
Sonny00:02:35It's a Thursday night game too. Those are always trash. Yeah, they're always trash
JVL00:02:39And the Phillies are in Philly This is the last home game of the season no matter what because MLB does this trash two three two format and and so You know after jumping out to a 2-1 series lead Philly got no hit last night and they're gonna lose tonight And because Verlander is still pitching jackass and Are the Phillies gonna lose in seven or are they gonna lose in six? That's the real question, right? Which is the most which is the bigger dagger is the bigger dagger to look good on a six? Cuz then you never even get the thrill of like oh we made it to a game seven Where's the bigger dagger to have the hope? So it's the hope that kills you that you get to game seven and then lose in Houston. I don't know
Sonny00:03:27Is so I'm sorry the series is I think seven the series is sevens were two to two right now. Is that right? Correct, and if they lose today, it's down. They're down to three Correct. If they lose today and they go down to three it would be worse to win game six and Get it to three three and then lose game seven
JVL00:03:48You think that's worse? But then you get to say like you look at least we went the distance as yeah, I think we say in Philadelphia Yeah, like the rock like rock they went the distance, you know, but it doesn't matter They lost on the scorecard at the end. They went all 12 rounds against Apollo Creed And this team this Houston Astros team is the Apollo Creed of baseball the worst. Why do you say that? They're so good. Well, first of all, it is clear to me that Everybody is cheating. All of the pitchers are cheating Aaron Nola. I don't know Have you guys what do you guys care about this? It's just my own obsessions
Sonny00:04:30I care air the the only thing that makes the show work is our obsessions JBL
JVL00:04:35Aaron Nola the the actual pee on the cap on his ball cap It looks so Discolored it says live somebody has been spitting chewing tobacco on it and before every effing pitch He reaches up touches the pee and then strokes The brim of his cap and then throw every one of these you watch them They're all touching some of them have got it clearly on like the inside of their pants pockets that the sticky stuff is bleeding through they Pedro Martinez showed that Farmer farmer Valdez from Astros like has this routine in which he's able to take rosin from the bag, which is legal And like superheat it by rubbing his hands together that it turns it sticky the point and but what's hysterical is The umps are still checking them you know all the pictures the end of the picture walks over and like Does this to the ump the ump says great and it's it's like the worst TSA security theater You know it's in and so Major League Baseball after deciding that they were you know Making a big deal of we're gonna cut down on the sticky stuff and the cheating and the spider-tack has now Basically just to say you know what this is fine. Just do it. We're gonna pretend work. We're cutting down on it But God did whatever you want to do
Sonny00:05:58What is this is this a function of just being able to see the cheating better than we ever have been able to in? the past is it a function of like super powerful cameras with 4k TVs and Just being able to get in there and like look at the actual molecules of gunk being pulled out of
JVL00:06:18The the mitts or whatever or what I think that what this is is that Major League Baseball was ultimately convinced by the pitchers that For safety reasons they need to be able to have the stuff Because if they can't get a better grip on the ball They're gonna kill people like there's no there's like ten guys now throwing over a hundred miles an hour, you know And if they can't command stuff the game gets dangerous And I think that's basically you know, they because they did you look at the spin rates They clearly cut down on the sicky stuff for like, you know, three or four months and then This what's funny about baseball is like you can tell what's were actually happening just by looking all the aggregate data You don't even need to look at the the video of it. You just say oh look at this This guy's spin rates up 400 rpms this game. I guess I guess and he's just like Kevin Costner Freedom for love of the game. Hey skip. I'm gonna throw a little harder today. I guess that must be what it is, you know anyway
Guest00:07:26I don't know and that's why I find baseball so exciting because you can just see it in the data instead of watch
JVL00:07:31This is the problem. Like it's turning baseball into a spreadsheet. This is this is what moneyball has done It's I don't know. Do you guys remember there was a one of the MML RPGs? I think it was like a space one. I don't know if was Starcraft or whatever, but famously Basically people hacked so deep into the game that they just turned the entire thing no longer became about quest Ng or beating up alien. It just all became a giant spreadsheet, you know Well if we harvest these crystals and then we have these guys and that's basically what baseball has become and I think we could stop it Pretty easily it would just require outlawing all of the data collection technology from the stadiums So getting rid of all the cameras there's like the high-speed cameras and the the computer stuff that is there in the stadiums during Games if you can get rid of that then people just can't collect the data, right? You can't it's a you know, it's like you can't measure launch rates
Sonny00:08:35Right and and right the the speed off the bat and that sort of thing. That's what you're talking about
JVL00:08:40Exactly, if you if you can't measure that stuff that whatever it's never going back
Sonny00:08:45We're never going back. I don't think
JVL00:08:48Enough of this baseball
Sonny00:08:51One more thing so that was the second that was the second no-hitter in the World Series ever right, I think so or the third was the second or the third and the Or no there were the other no wasn't there a perfect game in the playoffs a few years back But maybe that wasn't the World Series anyway the But it wasn't it wasn't a one pitcher no-hitter, right? It was a yeah, it was a staff Group no-hitter that shouldn't count but they that's my that's they the other team should get one hit just on principle Just so it's not counted as a no-hitter Does you know staff no-hitters shouldn't count is you sure you one man? Should have to put in the effort to get the no-hitter for the team
JVL00:09:34fair enough Mary Katherine, how are you? How are you doing? I'm alright which kids currently have hoof-and-mouth or RSV
Guest00:09:46Actually, we're I don't want to jinx it we're doing okay the parents are the problem Oh the parents are the problem right now. By the way, I do not have much of a take on pitchers and baseball data, but I do have a take that the historic loss is always worse the seventh game loss would be worse because the more Emotional and historic the loss the more you have to watch it the rest of your life and it's always there But you have to revisit so that's my take on that. But yeah, the parents are the issue over here today. I am Like third trimester pregnant with my fourth child And I am having trouble Yeah, like I'm but I'm At that stage we're like getting up a flight of stairs is difficult. It's a chairlift like, you know, that's bad for old people Well last night I was up part of the night with like acid reflux. You can't sleep. It's a whole it's a whole thing So this morning My husband comes down to find me on the couch because I was uncomfortable upstairs I came down, you know watch some true crime or whatever the ladies do to relax and get back to sleep And so he comes down and I'm pretty out of it And he's like, I'll take the girls to school. Don't you know, you don't worry about it I'm gonna he's gonna carry the weight today, right? Well, then he goes off to the gym Comes back with McDonald's for me. I will notice he's a good man. What is your McDonald's breakfast of choice?
JVL00:11:11Are you an egg McMuffin? Now bacon egg and cheese biscuit mmm strong every time strong
Guest00:11:18So he brings back McDonald's, but he's sort of he's sort of hobbling And my husband is a he's a fit man. He likes to be at the gym All right, comes back and may have may have definitely overdid it a little bit something something went awry at the gym Which is why it's heroic that the biscuit came through so he gets back and It's very clear that he needs to go to the doctor. What would it do suddenly? yeah, some back phasm issue, so Then I realized oh no now his his injury trumps my just sort of tiredness So I got to take I got to take the seat back here And do the things So he goes off he has a magical ability to get the proper doctor appointment anytime he calls I don't know if it's like his commanding voice or something But he just like can I have an appointment today, and they're like sure come to the specialist back. It's no problem
Sonny00:12:12So I don't know how he does it happens every time and present. We'll open up the MRI machine for you get on in here
Guest00:12:19Just wait so he gets he gets an appointment for this afternoon. I drive him over there to For him to the front door although he says that he will walk in because he's not He will die before his eight months pregnant wife wheels him into the doctor so he goes up to the doctor I come up later and meet him there, and I hear about the The the the encounter with the doctor which goes a little something like this Which is like wow she's like you seem like you're in quite a bit of pain He's like yes I am and if he's willing to admit that it's quite a lot of pain and then uh so she checks out his Lower back and she's like wow this back muscle is huge. He's like. Thank you. That's why I go to the gym She's like no no, I mean sir. This is the biggest back spasm. I've ever seen you need treatment immediately He's like oh, sorry. He was taking that as a compliment not a compliment. He got some some kind of injection and then after that He calls the MRI place now if I want an ultrasound for this baby Twice now I have called and they're like oh, that'll be Three and a half weeks ma'am He calls and they're like sir. We have a cancellation at 8:15 tomorrow morning. Oh, that's always nice So he will get his MRI tomorrow morning. We will hope it's a spasm It's likely something more complicated than that, but he's on the meds now, and he's feeling great
JVL00:13:43Well those back now those like Elaine and Seinfeld right she's
Sonny00:13:51I mean and the doctor told him his muscles were big so he's good. He's good. I mean that's That's I mean, that's a that's a big that's a big boost right there to hear about your big muscles from the doctor Never seen I I wouldn't I want to take it back two steps And and discuss something very important which is McDonald's breakfast sandwiches because I knew you reacted instantly you were like no biscuit Bacon egg and cheese biscuit And JBL your go-to was the Egg McMuffin. I'm just I'm curious. Do you guys always get the same sandwich every time you go I?
JVL00:14:24Do Hey, yeah, I'm I'm in 90/10 guy. I'm 90 90 percent Bacon egg and cheese and biscuit because at least when I worked at McDonald's the biscuits were fresh made every morning And they're really good. It's not been like that for a lot anymore No, like one of the things you do when you open to the store was make the biscuits
Sonny00:14:44No, well when I so when I worked at McDonald's from 96 to 2000 it was already like frozen they came with like sheets Of frozen biscuits and you would put them in the oven and they would they were crying
JVL00:15:01Well, I'll tell you what I don't ever do what I don't ever do is make griddles Because they taste okay at first, but there's an aftertaste to whatever syrup substitute They are using in the McGriddles. Yes, that is die. I do not care for that
Guest00:15:18Yeah, but griddles are like an in theory food. It tastes it sounds nice. You're like a little salty a little sweeten. Yeah
Sonny00:15:25I'm gonna I'm gonna throw this out there underrated McDonald's breakfast item are all of the bagel sandwiches It's it's it is my go-to hangover the steak and bagel Well, no, not that that not that one's not that one's not good, but the bacon a dollar breakfast sandwich at McDonald's Oh my god, the bacon egg and cheese bagel. There's a sauce that they put on it. That is like some sort of Buttery cheese sauce. I I couldn't tell you what it was made out of from when I worked there, but the but the Sauce that they put on it and like and and also just having the but but also it's just mass
JVL00:15:58There's just it's just a massive amount of food. So again, McDonald's bagel is an infamia. I mean, that's not a bagel
Sonny00:16:06It's it is a bread. It's it's good a bagel. It's as good a bagel as you can get in New York City I've been I've been to New York on a number of occasions and I've had the bagels there and I've been to my local McDonald's on many I've been to a hundred different McDonald's I could I've been to two McDonald's in every state and let me tell you lander
JVL00:16:25Just struck all these hot skins third time through the order. They struck him out. Oh Sorry, go ahead
Guest00:16:31This is this is the Chili's argument for bagels. Like there's just more of them from McDonald's and there's more McDonald's
Sonny00:16:39McDonald's wouldn't sell an inferior bagel if it didn't work. They'd find something that worked
JVL00:16:43They'd make it they'd make it work and that is of the four bread products The starch products that McDonald's uses in their breakfast. I would say that the bagel is the third ranked behind Only ahead of the McGriddle cake or whatever that is called It's vastly inferior to the the biscuit and quite a lot inferior even to the English muffin Which is not like a Thomas's English muffin. The McDonald's English muffin does not have tons of nooks and crannies No, it's it's okay. It's fine especially when they remember to add butter to it a lot of times you'll you'll get it and they will have forgotten to put the Butter on to dry that makes a huge difference. Yeah. No, the bagel is always nice and soft. I'm like I would go
Sonny00:17:25Biscuit number one bagel number two egg McMuffin sandwiches Look I'll eat I'll eat anything for McDonald's breakfast McDonald's like McDonald's breakfast is like even the McGriddle I will eat and like I'll take it and happily eat it the big breakfast platter
JVL00:17:41Do people still order those? Order like the pancakes and sausage from the pancakes in the pancakes and the scrambled eggs
Sonny00:17:49Yeah, the big plate. The sausage patty. Do they not order their own eggs fresh anymore?
Guest00:17:52With the little butter with the M on it
Sonny00:17:54The little the little pat of butter that goes in there. Yeah, that's the good stuff
JVL00:17:59You know, you know, what is a sneaky good place for breakfast? Wendy's Really never been Wendy's has this honey butter chicken biscuit and it's it's basically like a Fried fillet Piece of chicken on a biscuit with what they call honey butter and I don't know what that is, but it's amazing and the Whole thing just tastes like crack It's it's bad. Try it. Try it. I it's a I
Sonny00:18:33Feel like I feel like Hardee's has a pretty good breakfast, too But like it's basically any place you can get like a good biscuit biscuit chicken sandwich is gonna be good So like chick-fil-a solid Yeah, it's a solid option
JVL00:18:47Anyway, and what else is going on with you Mary Katherine anything else just you know incubating and trying to keep your family All alive, right running now. I have saying yeah
Guest00:18:59Well, we have we have a one-year-old so one of us is gonna have to be functional to lift the one-year-old
Sonny00:19:05While the other one is recuperate. I don't know why you're I don't understand why you're doing this to yourself, frankly I like I hear what you're taught. I hear what you're throwing out there and it sounds like my personal nightmare This is like Jason Segel in Playing golf with the in-laws and get whacked on the shins, you know, this is my nightmare
Guest00:19:24Yeah, like I well, there's two less. There's two lessons one don't have children in your 40s and two Don't go to the gym
Sonny00:19:35I went to the gym today. I go to the gym now and I like read a book on the bicycle I'm that age where I will just I will go and I will I will do I'll do 40. I will do 45 minutes on the exercise stationary bicycle and I will read a book and I will I will Take all of the judgment from the people who? Come in and are like, oh, I'm doing serious
Guest00:19:58Weightlifting. I mean, you're probably not gonna end up in an MRI tomorrow
JVL00:20:02So that I don't know I hunch over for you the next the next step is actually Doing your book review on the bike going slow enough writing You can be typing and writing as you go to get I have this review due to Washington Post I you know what? I'm gonna go to the go to the gym and I'll you know Just cycle for 45 minutes at a rate that's low enough to allow me to type
Sonny00:20:25Well, you say that but the book I'm reading right now is it's I'm reading Quentin Tarantino's new book because Vic has asked me to review it for his for his day job, and I was like yeah sure I can do that But what happens is I'm reading it I'm like trying to take notes and like I don't know if you've ever tried to bicycle and write at the same time It's very hard. It's actually very easy. You think I've come a little bit easier
JVL00:20:47I don't like but when you're are you on a recumbent or one of the no, it's just a stationary just a stationary bike though
Sonny00:20:54You mean? Is the recumbent the like lean back one? It's like we were sitting in a seat like a bucket. No. I know it's not like that It's just like a regular bike. It's very it's very hard to write It's very hard to like pull like flip to the back got to write my notes down flip back
Guest00:21:07It's very you need a recumbent bike and a lap desk
Sonny00:21:12I should just they should just set up like walking treadmill desks at the gym for people like me who are like I don't want to get a walking desk at home because that would be weird, but I would happily go to a place And use the walking use the walking desk with the treadmill underneath it that that would be Harper
JVL00:21:30Just got a two-out double Kyle Tucker boots it and right Harper stands up to second. What's the score? 2-1 Houston. We're in the bottom of five. Oh
Sonny00:21:42Look see that's you got plenty of time off. Yeah, plenty anyway. Hey, you want to talk about our movie? We all went to we haven't talked about we haven't talked about my week yet. Oh, I'm sorry Sonny My week wouldn't how I didn't I get to tell you about my week Let me tell you about my week to go to the poke Bowl No, what happened in my week was on on Monday or on Saturday on Saturday, so two days after my Four-year-old my now four-year-old was diagnosed with a pink eye. I got pink eye. Ooh Yeah, I don't sure did have you guys have you guys ever had? pink eye as an adult
Guest00:22:26No, I had hand foot mouth, but no pink guy. Let me tell you about pink eye as an adult
Sonny00:22:32I don't I probably must have had it as a kid. I don't really remember it. But where but pink eye as an adult is Genuinely the most horrifying illness. I think I've ever had. I mean I like I get you know, I've
JVL00:22:45Jump on this thing and like day one. I jumped on I was I literally by the first itch of my eye
Sonny00:22:52I was like, oh Fuck gotta go got a bye Beth. Gotta go got go to the doc. I'm going to the urgent care So I got there. I mean I literally had I Mean I had had no discharge or anything, but it was a little bit itchy. It was definitely a little pink I was like this I got it. I got it I'm just jumping on this right now and it getting ahead of it did nothing for me. It did absolutely Nothing. I started putting in the eye drops. It didn't matter the next morning my left eye had I don't I don't know how to describe it exactly but it was like I had been punched in the eye by my eye had swollen up Like it was a sausage. It was like this big fleshy Lump on top of my face to the extent that my wife literally recoiled in horror Which is not a thing. She's used to doing but it was it was it I mean it was both of my eyes end up getting infected. Of course the doctor was like, you know in adults Usually it's just one eye. It doesn't always transfer because you know, the adults are good at not touching their faces Like I don't know what adults, you know, but I'm constantly like rubbing around in my eyes so it jumps both the eyes get infected the first eye swells up to the size of like a Balloon man Michelin man eyes. I've got the big blown up Eyelid with the pink discharge the second day I wake the Sunday I wake up and that I has of course Frozen shut is it the goop has? Her and then together I have night. I wake I wake up at like four o'clock in the morning in a minor panic And I'm like oh wait. No. No, it's just the pink. Eye. It's fine. So then I like stumble into the bathroom I get a warm washcloth. I wash it I watch it as the next day progresses the the other eye starts to Balloon in size and get paying and start discharging and the best part of all this is that that that Saturday is my Yeah, so that Saturday was my four-year-old's birthday, so like I'm starting to get it like in in the midst of his party But not not till it was over really it was the next day when I had like the full-on like again Michelin man I we had we were having a pumpkin carving party at our house So I had to wear sunglasses the entire time Sun goes down at 7:00 p.m. I'm still out there One of one of one of the ladies is like oh, you know you're just Still just rocking your shades here at night, and I was like yes, ma'am. I am because I'm very cool I'm very cool like that their prescription. I need them
JVL00:25:34Corey Feldman I
Sonny00:25:36Was it was just it was just miserable you know the third day I wake up and the other eye is frozen shut so I got like it was it's it's genuinely I mean, but it was it is genuinely disgusting looking I was like I was you know again like my kids have had pink eye, and it has been like kind of gross It's like very it's like There's super bloodshot and whatever but with me like my eyes just like Expanded like I was out of an airlock in a space station and it is the pressure was trying to suck my eyeballs out Of my head it was gross So don't do yourself a favor and don't get pink eye as an adult
Guest00:26:12I would I would have gone with the Goonies themed Pumpkin carving parties
Sonny00:26:19Chunk could just have been I could have been sloth. I was very smooth like it was It was a it was gross Anyway, we saw a movie who wants to talk about movies now. It's disgusting Mary Katherine. Do you want to give a big girl review?
Guest00:26:33Oh my gosh, I don't know if I'm prepared for that
JVL00:26:36I have to let some I have to let Sonny do the big boy. So we the movie we went to see was the Ticket to Paradise is that even what it's paradise it's a paradise from the director of Mamma Mia 2 Which is I guess a thing people brag about I don't understand starring George Clooney and Julia Roberts two people who haven't been doing a lot of work recently, but who you enjoyed watching in oceans 11 and Kind of in oceans 12 and then these were big movies. So that's the entire thing is right These are big movie stars that you remember the biggest movie stars ever from the era before all movie stars had to be like the rock and Vin Diesel and We're gonna put them into a Grown-up movie for you so that you the grown-ups can go see it and enjoy it
Sonny00:27:30Yeah, right. Is that is that basically the premise? This is basically it's basically George Clooney and Julia Roberts being pretty on an island together
JVL00:27:37Yes, yes, right. This is a paid. This is a working vacation for them
Sonny00:27:41You know, we're gonna go quite Adam Sandler level like I'm gonna hang out with my friends in Hawaii. It's basically six months
Guest00:27:50It felt very Bali tourism board It's gonna pay for a movie and these guys want to hang out in Bali. Yeah
JVL00:28:00All right, it was a new Sunday do you want to do the big-boy reviewer do you want me to just give the plot to? people
Sonny00:28:04Ticket to Paradise. There we go Starring George Clooney and Julia Roberts as JBL mentioned this is a fucking excuse
JVL00:28:13Castellanos pops out Strands a runner on second. I'm sorry, please continue
Sonny00:28:20While watching ticket to paradise Starring George Clooney and Julia Roberts, they are divorced fit these last 15 years They are there. They have to get together to stop their daughter played by Caitlin Deaver Who is getting married to some Bali? Seaweed farmer that he met with incredible dreams Gonna give up her dreams of being a lawyer like all Bali seaweed farmers
JVL00:28:47He has amazing teeth because the orthodontics industry in in farms And in a far-flung islands is top-notch
Sonny00:28:57Advances have been made all over the world. Don't be probably just doing a smile direct
JVL00:29:01You don't even need to go to an orthodontist anymore You could just sit in front of your computer and the camera like like Warby Parker style will tell what they need They'll just send you the braces right and that's why this unbelievably handsome fellow who's just a humble seaweed farmer
Sonny00:29:17Yeah, yeah, he's got a lot of books in his in his room. They never really explain all his books. Well, he's a very well
Guest00:29:23Maybe I'm just a man of the warmer just a man. He's gonna deal with Whole Foods, right?
Sonny00:29:28He's a businessman. All right, you guys are being very cynical about this. You guys are being very cynical about this movie So this movie is an excuse to have pretty people on an island being mean and then nice to each other Which is basically all anybody wants anyway, it's the laziest. It's the it's the laziest plotted movie I think I've seen in a long long time. It is it is legitimately like there's I don't think there's an actual Joke in it. I don't think there's an actual like constructed joke like we're gonna do this thing and it's gonna lead to this punchline It's just like things kind of happen and then they don't With the with the one exception of like basically anytime our handsome seaweed farmer is talking to his parents in Balinese or whatever and they are doing translations and like Intentionally misleading George Clooney and Julia Roberts always I'm always up for a good translation joke. This movie's full of them but look here's Here's the thing. I'm gonna throw this out there. I'm gonna throw this out there lazy movie terribly plotted Doesn't even really hit all of the marks of a rom-com and what I mean by that is like in this movie the the the the pretty party girl best friend Absolutely 100% should have hooked up with the dumb French pilot. That is how that fucks George Clooney that well well that
JVL00:30:53She walks into the bar with him. I was like finally they might do something interesting They're gonna have him know his daughter's best friend
Sonny00:31:00You can't do that because you can't do that because it turns everybody against both those characters. You can't do that
JVL00:31:05I mean that would be more interesting. I agree life that girl walks into a bar with George Clooney Absolutely. No way. He doesn't banger. I
Guest00:31:12Look, I I'm very happy and I back me up. No, this is this is my number one quibble with this film and I think it was a little bit of Hollywood's sort of score settling that Julia Roberts got this young boy toy and zero women Hit on George Clooney this entire. Oh, he's just guys that is she says to him. No wonder you're still alone
JVL00:31:35Yes. Yes, this guy would walk through life alone, sir
Sonny00:31:39And it's it's unbelievable because he is actually Incredibly charming in this movie because you know what George Clooney is. He is a charming motherfucker He is a he is he is effortlessly charming and like there are there are times when I don't like George Clooney like I don't like George Clooney and most Coen brothers movies for instance because he's like doing a very broad sticky thing outside of like Burn after reading which I think he's okay in And like Hale Caesar kind of works because that works with mace mostly I just don't like him an old brother where are they fucking hate him in that movie? I love him in that way. I hate him in that movie. He's his face is all over the place. He's a Pulling a silly face cuz I'm in a comedy and I'm George Clooney. No, I don't like that. I don't like that and and there they but like One thing he does one thing he knows how to do is how to be effortlessly movie star charming He knows like that. That's that scene. We were just talking about with the with the the Daughter's friend and he is basically pouring his heart out He's like why didn't my marriage work and and the way that the way that scene is shot is they're not doing anything special here They're not reinventing the wheel the camera set at a mild angle and it slowly pushes in on him As he's sitting there kind of just holding this drink at the bar And that is the most charming anybody has looked on film in like the last ten years It's it's just amazing. I mean he is he is just pleasing to look at he's fucking Cary Grant to look at
JVL00:33:06He is the modern Cary Grant. No
Guest00:33:09He isn't it. I think they put him in those PJs on purpose to make him look like Cary Grant Little button-up PJs moment. No, he's he's what works in this movie
Sonny00:33:19Yeah, and and look Julia Roberts works, too. I like Julia Roberts in this movie She is a she she has that big giant Julia Roberts smile like that Her smile is as big as my laptop and that's amazing like good for her. I'm I'm she's a she's a she's an attractive woman She has aged gracefully. She looks great. She looks like she's having fun She looks like she's you know a fun person to be around and that is the that is the whole Charm of this movie that is the only reason this movie works and I do think it works as a replacement level level 90s early aughts era rom-com This is a perfectly acceptable sort of thing They used to make five of these a year and people would show up for them all the time and it's fine It's like I'm not I don't have high hopes for anything of this nature. I'm not a rom-com guy I don't care about the genre or the form what I enjoy is watching Attractive people look attractive on camera in real locations. No green screen work on this This isn't like the lost city where like every fifth shot is like a terrible green screen Recreation of like an actual place. It's it's all shot in in in real locations. It looks nice
JVL00:34:35It looks good. They look good. I am a hard disagree hard to disagree on all that. Um And I love rom-coms and I don't need them to be great. I love Notting Hill love Notting Hill love Runaway Bride Love the the Christmas Prince movies and the big I'm in I'm into all of that in a fucking out to they Hate that little midget Sorry Not too big. He's got on base because of course Anyway, I will do my rant a little bit Mary Katherine Are you with me? This did not do anything for you. Did it?
Guest00:35:16It did not work for me outside of that George Clooney is a delight. That was that was about All there was there for me. There was a moment when the daughter by the way, I don't get Caitlin Deaver Maybe she works for you guys. I don't I don't I'll tell you who yeah
JVL00:35:31I got you know who she works for. She works for somebody who's not on this show right now
Sonny00:35:36Yeah, I am like Caitlin Deaver. She's she's great. She was great and justified
JVL00:35:40That's where they know Vic's thought that since justified. She hasn't quite been It's good, but you know, trust me you like Caitlin Deaver just fine
Guest00:35:52There was a moment where Caitlin Deaver and her buddy were Lost in open water, and I was like I could be okay with this going open water That's how that's how this went down, but I just thought like just Just a little more effort on actual joke writing because you've got two people who can do this I mean, we're we're doing the suck in the venom out of somebody's snake bite like that. This is very old stuff and then the best the best joke in the whole thing actually was the last outtake in
Sonny00:36:30The steam I left in the credit gag reel. I was like I can't I can't watch this this is this is so during for me during that they're on the plane and
Guest00:36:40The flight attendant actress drops something a champagne glass or a sham a bottle of champagne on George Clooney and Julia Roberts says it's okay It's just George Clooney. We have another one and he says 1-800 Brad Pitt And it's the funniest joke in the whole damn movie. That's not and I was like, it's not a joke really We we should have squeezed some more some more of those into the actual film. The movie has
JVL00:37:03three different jokes that all hinge on One of the two stars using the word literally right now That's literally the whole job or that's literally what this stuff is made out of it the entire thing felt like it was written by a 25-year-old Trying to talk like a 25 year old Maybe does that sound is that wrong? Yeah and I Let me get let me let me share my biggest gripe my biggest gripe about this movie is that it is disrespectful To the institution of the movie star because there is a scene midway through in which George Clooney and Julia Roberts play beer pong and they get drunk and The Caitlin Deavers has the DJ put on 90s party music and they dance and it's like a dad joke, right? Look how embarrassing it is that my my old dad is trying to dance and he's dancing the house of pain and look at You know what? You never fucking catch Cary Grant doing that because Cary Grant had a legacy Right. He understood that he was Cary effing grant And you're George Clooney You barely work anymore as it is because you've just decided you'd rather hang out at Lake Como that rather than like door and Throughout this movie. He's barely acting. I mean, he looks like he's forgot people forget He used to be a good actor, you know charming and everything but he could actually act as well and now he can't even be bothered to do that and he's happy to just like jump around a mug for the camera like a monkey doing this Stuff that makes him look like an idiot And movie stars aren't supposed to allow themselves to be seen that way and I feel like that is a betrayal of Like the Hollywood Code Right, you know there there are certain levels of stars who shouldn't allow themselves to be seen It's like it would be like Tom Hanks getting filmed Re IRL drunk in a bar Nobody wants to see that you're Tom Hanks. You're America's dad. You don't you don't go to a bar
Sonny00:39:22I get drunk, but it would be bad like to see drunk Tom Hanks. Just railing like the Cheesecake Factory bar Just like just like you I'm Forrest Gump I'm Philadelphia
JVL00:39:38Anyway because of that I didn't like it and I felt it was disrespectful
Guest00:39:42But I mean, okay, let me throw this out. Cary Grant did slapstick, right? So there's some of that where the the super charming guy can have a lot of different but not mode Successfully, although but when he did slapstick and when he did comedies, they were extremely well-written. Yes
JVL00:39:59He wasn't himself into a figure of fun in the way that I mean, that's that's the problem in this movie
Sonny00:40:05The problem of this movie is that it is it is totally underwritten. It is it is there's there again there there are there are no actual jokes with like Setup punchline set up punchline like it's just like things happening and then somebody is like, can you believe that? Just happened You didn't throw away the bag of rings
JVL00:40:28Crazy this feels like a Netflix movie. Does it not? Yeah
Sonny00:40:33Like well, that's where I mean, that's where all these movies have disappeared to is is Netflix
JVL00:40:37I mean this feels like just if if the makers of Red Notice wanted to make a big-budget rom-com This is what they would have done Right. There was a well, there are a couple movie stars who haven't we seen in a while who's old enough to credibly Play mom and dad Oh George Clooney. Oh, yeah I people liked oceans 11 right and the the we know that the Netflix Recommendation engine will surface this for anybody who's ever watched one of the oceans 11 movies and so that's uh, this sounds like a surefire hit for Netflix and
Guest00:41:09I don't know. I
JVL00:41:11was I was vaguely angry and and also You know as a child of a broken home I Fucking hate Really? really hate the ideas of like Divorces is just being these happy-go-lucky things where you know when a man and a woman have a child together and then they get divorced They can just be together and quip, you know, ah, they're sort of they're they're they're sparring. They're clipping back and forth one I'm sorry. That is that is not what divorce looks like. It's horrible
Sonny00:41:47No, but I I do think they did a pretty good job of especially in the early going being like these two People really don't like each other very much I did I did feel like they they had that More or less down and then they then they have to get then they get to the like we have to work together apart Well, I'm like, whatever. I didn't I that didn't that didn't bother me too much. Yeah, I felt like
Guest00:42:08There's potential that that was really ugly because if you're still dealing with it 25 years later and this Pitched a manner then something went very badly I thought there was a lot to mine here if someone had been interested in Writing the movie I I feel like I'm in the demo, right? These people look like they might have trouble getting up a flight of stairs occasionally or hurt themselves at the gym This is where this is where I am in life And some thoughts about you know What that looks like and raising your kid and your expectations for your kid would have been a fun part of this
Sonny00:42:42But they just never really connected and do you watch do you watch any of the Netflix rom-coms Mary Catherine? Yes, what do you what do you watch? When you're watching the Netflix rom-com, what do you what do you like sitting down and watching?
JVL00:42:57I'm trying to think what the last one I've watched was do you only watch holiday themed like an Arbor Day meetup?
Guest00:43:05No, but I do I do overdose at Christmastime for whatever reason I don't what do we got coming this?
JVL00:43:11Christmas Mary Catherine. What do we have to look?
Guest00:43:13There's a whole I mean cat a Candace Cameron Bray has made a whole new set of them Netflix got a set Hallmark's got a set I'm gonna be I can't wait isn't there for the
Sonny00:43:21Whole season isn't there a Lindsay Lohan Christmas rom-com? Oh, yes, there is coming that one's on Netflix
JVL00:43:27I believe miss in the hills
Guest00:43:29Yeah, I can't remember the last time I watched but I'm really just looking for something that hits the beats and goes down easy. That's that so do you I guess I guess what?
Sonny00:43:41I'm asking is do you just let Netflix be like here's a thing you might like and then you watch it Yes, so you're never you're never searching anything out on Netflix is what I'm at what I'm asking you. You're just Like okay, this is this is like the thing that the algo is like, uh, this is what you should watch
Guest00:43:56Yes, and sometimes I'll turn it on and it's terrible and I just turn it off. But how much time do you give it? 20 minutes 20 minutes. Okay. Yeah, which in this movie is what got us to the open water scene
Sonny00:44:10Yeah, I Had turned on it
Guest00:44:14Yeah, but part of part of this movie's issue too is that it was a little too long I think you could just shave some of it if you're not gonna write
Sonny00:44:21Yeah, now we're 48 of nothing, right if you're not gonna write a real movie The least you could do is get us in and out in like 90 minutes, you know, Bali's beautiful though
Guest00:44:31So the Bali tourism board really so I wanna I want to say there were there were a couple scenes in it
JVL00:44:37especially the sunset scenes and the sunset sunrise scenes and Unless my theater was just the worst screen and projector ever like isn't this the most amazing sunrise you've ever seen? That's nice of this. This just looks like a The Sun's coming out like this. There are better sunrises in Top Gun Maverick There are better sunrises in literally every National Geographic Documentary ever filmed like what this is that's not actually Attractive for a beautiful Lee would did you have the same reaction Mary Catherine?
Guest00:45:12Like I was I was a little underwhelmed the vegetation and the hikes and that was a little day I but then they go to this like the best place to watch a sunrise in all of Bali
JVL00:45:21And yeah, it didn't do and here's is it look I don't want to take this movie seriously so negative about it I don't want to take this movie seriously, but I would say that if if I was the divorced parent of an only child and At age I can't tell if she's 23 or 25 because she has just graduated from college But also is about to start at a law firm as a lawyer So it's good. Maybe she did a combined degree where she did a four-year Undergrad slash JD somehow who goes she's very intelligent. I I didn't I didn't understand what was going on there either, but Anyway, and and my daughter at age 2023 announces that she's going to move to the literally the furthest point on earth away from me To settle there for the rest of her days. I would take that as the kind of Syrian indictment of my life and my my purpose and everything that I'd ever meant to do on this earth and The the idea that parents would just look at that and you know Well first they'd think that maybe she was throwing her life away, but then after 72 hours, they would say man. She just looks happy
Guest00:46:38Wait, I yeah, I don't think that's insane. That's insane
JVL00:46:43No Again, I'm too much
Guest00:46:47No, I think you're right. I'm with you
Sonny00:46:51You don't give you nothing of I I would just let her go I'd be like well lost cause Fine whatever I got another one do better with that one, I guess You got to know what you got to look you're gonna lose her forever ever either way might as well not have her all Pissed off at you on the other end of the world
Guest00:47:13Did I gotta say spoiler alert when they did get together in the end? The the parents it was cute, and I was a little bit
Sonny00:47:21Like what's happening? Are they moving to Raleigh together the movie worked are they moving to there?
JVL00:47:26They're they're all gonna live there is a how are they family with the other happy body family who's gonna pay for everything?
Sonny00:47:31Where's the money coming from do they not have mortgages? Oh, you're telling me people in Bali don't need architects to build their massive malls Is that what he is and sporting complexes and apartment buildings I? Yeah, he was an architect. She's uh she's an art dealer. She they need art dealers in Bali to you know so I
Guest00:47:51This family this family seems like funds are not an issue so ran
Sonny00:47:55Yeah, they definitely did not seem to be worried about money They were just hopping on like business class flights to Bali
JVL00:48:00The the girls the the main character Lily her friend ran the one who who I insist should have banged George Clooney I Don't know about you so I felt as though there must have been earlier drafts where her character was taken in different directions and in one of them I Think she winds up in a romantic relationship with the sister of the boyfriend slash fiance Did you pick up on that at all? Like yes, the two of them were yes We're just photographed closely together and I was like, oh and I was waiting for that to be a reveal at the end Like oh then they're a happy couple - right since since they didn't pair her off with Paul, which is the obvious thing, right? These things are all about everybody gets a happy ending. It's the love boat. And so they don't pair her off with Paul, which is the obvious thing and but she's photographed with you know, or shot with the the Sister who has gotten a lot of screen time for reasons that aren't quite clear anyway And anyway, I think at some point the two of them are a couple in that in one of the drafts
Sonny00:49:07I would go I I thought the exact same thing and you know, look I I don't have any special insight here I don't have any actual knowledge but I would go so far as to guess that there is a cut of this film that got screen tested with that in it and The the numbers for old women who are the primary audience target for the fifty five-year-old house frowns came back so negative that Somebody at Universal like threatened to throw the entire thing on the fire was like that girl is not all it She doesn't have to be straight You don't gotta you don't gotta marry her off to Paul or whatever, but she is not winding up with the Bali girl I imagine that I would guess
JVL00:49:51The Bali family was so unbelievably traditional would be perfectly fine with that
Guest00:49:54I'm sure that they would so this isn't this is another I hate to I hate to go all woke on us, but We get almost nothing from the Bali family, and I understand they're not the movie stars But it seemed a little odd that they're completely fine But there's just a white American chick after a month and there's no talk of that. There's no investigating that there's nothing
Sonny00:50:17Yeah, well, they're just not I mean they're the the drama in this movie does not cannot or originate from them for reasons of Like you know you're gonna you're gonna have the white screenwriter and the white director come in and tell this Bali cultural Situation how they're supposed to react to this now you can't do but like on top of that They're just not they're not they're not where the the source of tension and locus of drama in the film is like if you're going To have this film the you basically have to have all of the tension on the Clooney Roberts side of the thing. That's the only way it yeah
JVL00:50:54I mean the only way you can succeed is as a romp Where you spend every single minute with Clooney and Roberts, and they're just doing enjoyable things and saying witty things to one another And I don't know like it just Mary Katherine Did you pick up on what she was wearing Julia Roberts because I do not believe she wore anything that wasn't a jumpsuit Some of the jumpsuits were long long sleeve and long pants Some of the jumpsuits were short pants and truth, but they were all one-piece jumpsuits for like the last half of the movie
Sonny00:51:27She looked like a house painter. Yeah, it was strange
Guest00:51:30I know that jumpsuits are sort of in right now, but it seemed like an odd choice I didn't like her in the the short suit The I think the only thing she wore that wasn't a jumpsuit of some kind was at the wedding scene And that was the best she looked the entire because it was a beautiful dress I think that was a dress and it looked great, but yes, there was a lot of hiking around the the the jungles and
Sonny00:51:54Painter outfits I mean colors like am I am I wrong that she looked she looked like she was going to paint somebody's house I was like and a Mary Mary Catherine. You're right. This is very it's a very it's look that's very in right now I know from my Perusal of the women's sections of various stores, you know, I just wander around through them, you know That's no I don't like you do but but like I get that that is a look that is in I'll tell you who it doesn't Look good on a Julia Roberts in this movie who's in a tropical paradise. She's wearing like long corduroy painter outfits and I'm like Aren't you hot? Aren't you Julia? I think Roberts. Aren't you? Aren't you just too warm for that right now? I don't understand But also yes, you're Julia Roberts. You should be wearing like dresses look nice. Why don't you put some effort in? Oh
JVL00:52:44Smile more wins there. You should smile more
Sonny00:52:47Smile more. No, but this is this is the thing She's got a great smile. Her smile is wonderful. She looks she looks great the whole movie. She it's just her outfits look like she was
Guest00:52:59Very Catherine understand if the audience for this is old as well, which I embrace. Yes old audience these these guys Drink Bali moonshine all night long and then get up the next morning and you know There's like a faint towards being there's a nod to being hungover They're like right back on their feet at 11 o'clock. I know by brunch. They're good. That is not how that
JVL00:53:28Yeah, all right before we get out of here Mary Katherine. I have to ask Can you rank the Julia Roberts rom-coms for me? Doesn't have to be complete. You don't have to do the entire three How about I would take a top three and as we always do okay start from three and go up right Sonny
Sonny00:53:49Yeah, you started three number three number two number one
Guest00:53:54Okay One quick question Does mystic pizza counters that to drama to drama? Yeah, that's a dramedy I just I just really like I just really like her in that movie Okay, so then number three for me, and this is gonna be controversial Would be Notting Hill which other people love much more than I do
JVL00:54:16It is just not to see where else you go with this cuz I have to love that movie I
Guest00:54:22I know and I really like both. Well, I don't love Julia Roberts, which is part of the issue really, but I
JVL00:54:29Really like you America's Sweetheart, and you don't love her
Guest00:54:33And she's fine. It's just not my fave Okay, no, no, I'm sorry to disappoint you Then I guess number two would be my best friend's wedding. She's no Vanessa Hudgens, I guess Vanessa Hudgens It all my friend
JVL00:54:52Okay, best friend's wedding
Guest00:54:53And then and then I number one is pretty woman. I can't turn down pretty woman. That's it. That's a basic cable classic I watch it every time I see it anywhere anytime Julia Roberts has a hooker even though the premise is insane The premise is insane, but it still works. I don't know how insane it is
JVL00:55:10I imagine lots of John's fall in love with their with their call girls and decide that they're gonna rescue them from that life and most of those girls Are just working their way through law school And it's just a thing they do while they're working their way through law school And they're you know, I I bet it happens more often than you think
Sonny00:55:32Not my experience tell you
JVL00:55:37I Can't believe you you are not a Julia Roberts fan
Guest00:55:45I'm not a super fan, but I think she's cute and she's fun. I just
JVL00:55:50put her Even above Sandra Bullock whom I think is well, I love Sandy Bullock I think Sandy Bullock is amazing and can do basically do anything
Guest00:56:03I'll take I'll take Sandra Bullock And I liked I think I liked the Meg Ryan rom-com is better than the Julia Roberts rom-coms
JVL00:56:11What's happened to her has made it hard to? Say, but it's interesting sunny. I'm what are some of your favorite rom-coms? Where's some of your favorite actresses and you know movies with strong female leads in them
Sonny00:56:26the net The Zack Snyder Dawn of the Dead Sarah Polly, that's a oh strong woman guys
JVL00:56:43We're in the bottom of the six the Phillies have to aboard with two out and Kyle Schwarber who has one home run in this game already up
Sonny00:56:50To that. Oh boy. Well, we better we better wrap things up. All right. All right, okay
Guest00:56:55Wait, can I can I say my top two rom-com? Yes. Oh, it's of all of the entire genre I have one modern and one old old bringing up baby, which is just fantastic with Cary Grant Kevin Hepburn and When Harry met Sally insightful fun. It's beautifully written the whole thing. I love it. I love it
JVL00:57:17Philadelphia story is my go-to of that also Cary Grant and Catherine Hepburn. Yeah, well, it's no Philadelphia experiment. I'll tell you what
Sonny00:57:25All right
JVL00:57:27Okay, that's shorter. That's ending over. Oh
Sonny00:57:30Too bad. See if we had gotten off earlier. You would have been fine. All right spirit of the week correction shoutouts I'm drinking a dogfish head pumpkin ale. Ooh, that's what I'm that's like pumpkin season
JVL00:57:42Pumpkin season now, you're not drinking Mary Catherine. So could you tell us what are the pills that your husband is taking? oxy of the week
Guest00:57:54There's there's either Percocet or some kind of oxycodone down there I'm pretty nice and I would I would have a cocktail while pregnant because this is my fourth child and you can do that But I have to stay in control because that guy's not gonna be in control for a while. You're on call
JVL00:58:12Once pregnant lady is on call There Catherine, he's very resilient. Thank you for coming into doing this. It is
Guest00:58:20They don't like to say oh my gosh. Yes
Sonny00:58:22Thank you always always a pleasure. That is all the time. We are giving to this episode Questions comments compliments tweet us at Sonny Bunch at what it's at MK hammer, right? Yeah at MK hammer will still be I you know, I will happily pay Elon Musk my $8. I'm never going I'm never leaving that hell site ever Take my money Elon. All right, make sure to subscribe to us on the patreon and sub You can get a calm go to T public etc, etc Tell your friends until next time All right, I got nothing nothing else no
JVL00:59:09No other so really that's it we're gonna we're gonna All right, well, you know, let's tease a little VIXX stuff
Sonny00:59:21Mary Catherine, how are we allowed? Are we allowed to talk about the Gabriel number two or it's a HIPAA violation?
JVL00:59:26Probably how concerned are you Mary Catherine on a scale of one to ten? Based on what you have heard about
Guest00:59:35His procedure. I I feel like we're in a good place. Although he has not texted me about His personality seems unchanged which was my greatest concern It did not leave with the tooth. I am upset with Kate that she did not oversee
JVL00:59:56Retaining the tooth. We don't have that. We don't have it. He had said he wanted to keep it
Sonny01:00:01Wait, they got rid of it. They threw away the little baby Gabriel
JVL01:00:05No, they didn't throw it away that that thing that dr. Strange had in no way home that he had to You know the spell to trap all the things in it to get rid of the time They had to bring in one of those to him Yeah, that makes sense. So it is they did just like throw it into one of those biomedical waste, you know Be careful with handling stuff. Yeah, you don't want to do that. Well, I don't I don't want to give anything away It's his story to tell obviously, but there are there were a couple things he said to me that left me Concerned I'm sure it's fine
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